NFL Week 5 parlay: Cardinals, Texans, Browns
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Last week's parlay was a miserable disgrace and I'm content leaving it at that.
Let's move on to bigger and better things in Week 5.
Cardinals ML -320 (at Jets)
There's no better recipe for a suddenly ailing Cardinals team than a date with the Jets. After a promising start, Arizona fell to 2-2, losing to the Lions and Panthers. Its explosive offense reverted back to its conservative 2019 form and the defense struggled. Luckily, the Cardinals now face a Jets offense that was miserable before losing its starting quarterback and standout rookie tackle.
Given how the last few weeks have unfolded for the Cardinals, we can be assured this isn't a game they will take lightly. It's a prime get-right spot for Kyler Murray and Kliff Kingsbury's offense and a proper elixir for their defense. It would require an epic collapse for Arizona to lose this game.
Texans ML -260 (vs. Jaguars)
Is it just me, or does this feel like the game where the Texans extend a middle finger to Bill O'Brien with a good old-fashioned beatdown of a division rival? There was clear dysfunction in Houston between the head coach and players, and there's no better way for the Texans to close that chapter than by running rampant over a Jaguars team ripe to be picked on by Deshaun Watson and Co.
Jacksonville bleeds yards through the air, allowing 8.3 yards per pass - third most in the NFL - and isn't helped by a non-existent pass rush. This is an achievable task for Romeo Crennel in his first game as interim head coach, leading a motivated group in desperate need of the fresh start it has received.
Browns ML +105 (vs. Colts)
Trusting the Browns seems suboptimal. We've seen this before from Cleveland - right as people are hopping on board, the ship sinks. But there are a lot of positives to take from this offense under the new regime, and that's without Baker Mayfield contributing much to this point. The running game has been the NFL's best, which is largely down to the vastly improved play of the offensive line. With Nick Chubb out, it will be the Kareem Hunt show Sunday.
The Browns could be aided on the ground by some major absentees on defense for the Colts, with star linebacker Darius Leonard missing practice. As a unit, the Colts have been the best defense in the league this season, but they've hardly been tested. A Cleveland offense hitting its stride will be a great measuring stick.
On the other side of the ball, the Colts have been quite pedestrian despite a favorable schedule. Philip Rivers is struggling to push the ball down the field and the ground game is averaging just 3.5 yards per rush - the worst mark in the NFL. The Browns are eighth in the NFL, allowing just 3.8 yards per rush on defense while averaging 5.9 - most in the NFL - on offense. Cleveland rides the ground game to an ugly win here.
Full parlay: Cardinals ML, Texans ML, Browns ML ($100 to win $273)
(Odds source: theScore Bet)
Alex Moretto is a sports betting writer for theScore. A journalism graduate from Guelph-Humber University, he has worked in sports media for over a decade. He will bet on anything from the Super Bowl to amateur soccer, is too impatient for futures, and will never trust a kicker. Find him on Twitter @alexjmoretto.